Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Hindu Marriage

Part One

I. Reception of the bridegroom (Vara Satkaarah)

[Note: As soon as the bridegroom’s party arrives, they are warmly welcomed by the bride's parents, relatives and friends. At the entrance of the hall the threshold ceremony is performed. The officiating priest chants a few mantras of blessings and welcome. The threshold ceremony requires the bride’s mother to receive and bless the groom with rice, red tumeric powde (kumkum) etc., by applying tilak (red dot and uncooked rice) on the groom’s forehead. She sprinkles rice and red tumeric powder on the groom, and then blesses him with the palms of both hands- stretching them close to the groom’s head. Now the priest and the bride’s parents lead the bridegroom and his parents to the stage where they are given appropriate seats.All the other guests take their seats in the hall to witness the marriage ceremony.

To the accompaniment of ceremonial mantras by the officiating priest the bride’s parents welcome the groom by invoking God’s blessings and then offering the bridegroom a nutritious drink called Madhuparka. This is called the Madhuparka Ceremony, the origin of which dates back thousands of years when Rishis and sages of India used it as a way of welcoming guests.]

The bridegroom shall stand facing the east. The Bride shall stand facing the north. The bride (offering the seat or Asana, shall address the bridegroom as follows:

The bride:
Aum, The noble one may accept and take the seat.

The bridegroom:
Aum, I am taking my seat. [Om, Pratigrahnami].

The bride shall take her seat to the right of the bridegroom.

The bridegroom performs the Achamana and Angasparsha with water.
[Note: All Hindu religious ceremonies begin with two observances, namely Achaman or sipping a small quantity of water and angasparsha or touching one’s limbs with one’s right hand middle two fingers with a little water. Achaman is purificatory and conducive to peaceful attitude of mind. Angasparsha is intended to pray for physical strength and alertness. Achaman and Angasparsha are performed with the aid of Mantras].

Madhuparka Ceremony

Holding with his left hand a cup of Madhuparka (composed of honey, curd and ghee or clarified butter), after removing the cover and looking at the Madhuparka,

The bridegroom says:

  • May the breeze be sweet as honey; may the streams flow full of honey and may the herbs and plants be laden with honey for us!
  • May the nights be honey-sweet for us; may the
    mornings be honey-sweet for us and may the heavens be honey-sweet for us!
  • May the plants be honey-sweet for us; may the sun be all honey for us and may the cows yield us honey-sweet milk!

      [Note: ‘honey-sweet’ = pleasant, advantageous, conducive to happiness.]

      The bridegroom shall pour out the Madhuparka into three cups and then partake a little of it from each of the cups reciting the following Mantra:

      The bridegroom:
      The honey is the sweetest and the best. May I have food as sweet and health-giving as this honey and may I be able to relish it!

      Gift of a cow

      [Note: The bride’s father symbolically offers to the bridegroom a cow as a present. In olden times sons-in-law received real cows as gifts, since that was the most precious asset with which a newly wedded couple could start life. This part of the tradition has been preserved by a symbolical presentation. At the conclusion of the first part of the wedding ceremony, it is customary to present gifts to the bride. The bridegroom presents the bride with gifts of clothing and jewellery thereby acknowledging his life-long duty to provide her with the necessities of life.]

      The father of the bride, offering to the bridegroom the present of a cow, a finger-ring or some other suitable article says:

      The father of the bride:
      AUM, (Please) accept these presents.

      The bridegroom:
      Aum, I accept (these presents)

      II. The giving away of the bride (Kanya-Danam)

      [Note: ‘Kanya’ means daughter or girl. ‘Daan’ means giving away. This is an important part of the marriage ceremony in which the bride’s parents give her away to the groom by entrusting her to the bridegroom. The officiating priest chants appropriate verses in Sanskrit. The people in the audience (the public) is now notified that the parents have willingly expressed their wish and consent by requesting the groom to accept their daughter as his bride. As soon as the groom indicates his acceptance the bride’s parents place their daughter’s right hand into the bridegroom’s right hand. The parents now bestow their blessings on both the bride and the groom and pray to the Lord to shower His choicest blessings on them.]

      The father of the bride, placing her right hand on the right hand of the bridegroom, says:

      The father of the bride:
      Be pleased to accept hand of my daughter (name of the bride) of the Gotra (here the surname of the family shall be given).

      The bridegroom:
      AUM, I do accept.

      The bridegroom makes an Offering of the garment and the scarf to the bride to wear.

      The bridegroom wears the garments and the scarf offered by the parents of the bride.

      Then facing each other The bride and the bridegroom speak as follows:

      Ye learned people assembled at this sacred ceremony know it for certain that we two hereby accept each other as companions for life and agree to live together most cordially as husband and wife. May the hearts of us both be blended and beat in unison. May we love each other like the very breath of our lives. As the all-pervading God sustains the universe, so may we sustain each other. As a preceptor loves his disciple, so may we love each other steadfastly and faithfully.
      - RigVeda X.85.47

      Addressing the bride, the bridegroom says:
      .Distant though we were, one from the other, we stand now united. May we be of one mind and spirit!

      2. Through the grace of God, may the eyes radiate benevolence. Be thou my shield. May thou have a cheerful heart and a smiling face. May thou be a true devotee of God and mother of heroes. May thou have at heart the welfare of all living beings!

      Rig Veda X.85.44

      The bride:
      I pray that henceforth I may follow thy path. May my
      body be free from disease and defect and may I ever
      enjoy the bliss of your companionship!

      Part Two
      (The marriage ceremony proper)

      III. The Nuptial Homa (Vivah-homa
      or the sacred fire ceremony).

      [Note: All solemn rites and ceremonies commence with the performance of Homa (sacred fire ceremony) among the followers of Vedic religion. The idea is to begin all auspicious undertakings in an atmosphere of purity and spirituality. This atmosphere is created by the burning of fragrant herbs and ghee and by the recitation of suitable Mantras. Also see Page ‘Mantras-Sacred Fire’].

      The Achaman and Angasparsha are performed for the second time. The bride also participates.

      The three Achaman mantras involve sipping of a little water three times.

      The seven Angasparsha mantras involve touching water with the right hand middle two fingers apply the water to various limbs first to the right side and then the left side as follows:

      Mouth 2.Nostrils 3.Eyes 4.Ears 5.Arms 6.Thighs 7. Sprinkling water all over the body.

      IV. Acceptance of Hand (Pani-Grahanam).

      The bridegroom rising from his seat and facing the bride, shall raise her right hand with his left hand and then clasping it says:

      The bridegroom:
      I clasp thy hand and enter into the holy state of matrimony so that we may be blessed with prosperity and noble progeny. Mayst thou live with me happily throughout life! Through the grace of the all-mighty Lord, who is the Creator and Sustainer of the universe and in the presence of this august assemblage, thou art being given away in marriage so that we may together rightly perform our duties as householders.

      1. With all my strength and resources, I have clasped thy hand; and thus united, we shall together follow the path of virtue. Thou art my lawfully wedded wife and I am thy lawfully wedded husband.
      2. God, the protector and sustainer of all, has given thee to me. From today, it devolves upon me to protect and maintain thee. Blessed with children, mayst thou live happpily with me as thy husband for the full span of human life (a hundred years).
      3. Following the divine law and the words of wisdom uttered by the sages, may we make a good couple and may God vouchsafe unto us a shining life of virtue and happiness.
      4. As God nourishes and sustains all creatures through His great forces like the sun, the moon, the earth, the air etc., so may He bless my wife with healthy and virtuous progeny and may you all assembled here bless her!
      5. I accept thee as my partner for life. I will not keep away even mentally anything from thee. I will share with thee all I enjoy. We will persevere in the path of virtue, surmounting all obstacles.

      V. Solemn vows (Pratigna-Karanam)

      The bridegroom taking the palm of the bride into his hand helps her to rise and then they both shall walk round the altar, the bride leading. Then facing the east take the solemn vows:

      The bridegroom:
      O virtuous one! I have accepted thee thoughtfully and so hast thou accepted me. Out of the fullness of love have I accepted thee and so hast thou accepted me. I am the Sama and thou art the Rik. I am the Dyau (heaven) and thou art the earth. We marry each other joyously. May we be blessed with bright, heroic and long-lived children!

      The bride and the bridegroom:
      Let us be devoted to each other. Let us share each other’s joys and sorrows, wish each other well and look upon each other with love and live for at least a hundred years. May we live happily for at least a hundred years. May we live,
      listening to sweet words for at least a hundred years.

      VI. Ascending the slab(or stepping on the stone) [Shila arohanam or Shilarohanam]

      [Note: ‘Shila’ means stone. ‘Arohan’ means ascending or stepping upon. This is the stone-stepping ceremony. The mother of the bride assists her to step onto a stone and counsels her to prepare herself for a new life. A married couple is likely to encounter ups and downs, joys and sorrows, prosperity and adversity, sickness and health. In spite of difficulties facing them they are enjoined to remain steadfast and true to each other (just as a stone can weather any storm- rock- steady).

      The bride shall place her riight foot on the slab (stone), assisted by her mother or her brother. The priest recites a Mantra from the Atharva Veda (AV II.13.4)

      VII. The fried-rice offerings (Laja-Homah)

      [Note: ‘Laja’ means puffed rice or barley like popcorn.]

      The bride shall place the palms of her hands over those of the bridegroom and make three offerings (ahutis) of fried rice soaked in ghee (clarified butter).

      The bride:

      1. I adore God, the unifier of hearts. Now that I am leaving my parents’ home for my husband’s, I pray that He may keep us perpetually united!
      2. With these offerings I pray for Long life for my
        husband and for the prosperity of all our relations!
      3. (Addressing her husband) In making these offerings for your prosperity I once again pray that God may bless this union of our hearts!

      VIII. Circumambulation around the sacred fire
      (Parikrama or Pradakshina or Mangal fera)

      [Note: This is an auspicious and important part of the marriage ceremony. It consists in walking around the sacred fire (clockwise) four times. This aspect of the ceremony and the one that follows, namely Saptapadi (seven steps)- constitute the most important part, in as much as it legalises the marriage according to Hindu custom and tradition. These two aspects of the marriage ceremony establish an indissoluble matrimonial bond between the couple.

      In the first three rounds the bridegroom leads the bride as they circle together around the sacred fire. In the fourth (last) round, the bride leads the bridegroom around the sacred fire.

      In each round around the sacred fire, an appropriate mantra is recited which expresses noble sentiments in relation to their future matrimonial life. Each round culminates in both the bride and the bridegroom placing offerings or ahutis of fried rice in the sacred fire. The Hindu religion emphasises enjoyment of life as well as the discharging of family, social and national responsibilities.

      During the first three rounds, God’s blessings and help are sought; loyalty to each other is emphasised and; a promise to keep in mind the well-being and care of the future children is made.

      In the fourth (last) round (led by the bride) the bride promises that she will lead her life according to the tenets of the Hindu religion, namely Satya and Dharma or Truth and devotion to duty, and that she will always ensure that the bridegroom can rely on her to carry out her family, religious and household duties.

      The bridegroom then places his hand on the bride’s head and states that henceforth she will be his wife and he will shield her against any danger or harm.

      At the end of the four rounds they shall exchange seats, the bride taking her seat to the left of the bridegroom.]

      IX. Seven Steps (Saptapadi)

      The ends of their garments (the bridegroom’s scarf and upper garment of the bride) are tied together by the priest (signifying marriage knot).Then both shall stand facing the north. The bridegroom shall place his right hand upon the right shoulder of the bride.

      They shall take the first step in the north easterly direction.

      In taking these seven steps, the right foot shall always lead and the left foot be brought forward in line with it. Uncooked grains of rice (about a small handful) are placed in a line at equal distance at seven places. The bride and the groom take seven steps together, stepping upon first mound of rice with the right foot as the priest recites a mantra. Then stepping upon the second mount of rice with the right foot as the priest recites a mantra. (All seven steps are done the same way).

      May the first step lead to food that is both nourishing and pure.

      May the second step lead to strength (at the physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual levels).

      May the third step lead to prosperity.

      May the fourth step lead to all round happiness.

      May the fifth step lead to progeny (noble and virtuous children).

      May the sixth step lead to long life.

      May the seventh step lead to friendship (through harmony, understanding).

      The bridegroom says:
      Having completed the seven steps, be thou my life long companion. Mayst thou be my associate and helper in successful performance of the duties that now devolve upon me as a householder. May we be blessed with many children who may live the full duration of human life!

      After the completion of the seven steps ceremony, the couple (with knots tied to each other) take their seats. The wife now takes her rightful place on the left side of her husband as the marriage is now religiously solemnized in its entirety. Now the couple are husband and wife. The husband garlands the wife and she in turn garlands her husband.

      X. Sprinkling of water (Abhishek).

      The priest (or a brother of the newly wedded wife) shall sprinkle water on the foreheads of the bride and the groom. The priest recites mantras from the Rig Veda (RV X.9.1/2/3) during the sprinkling of water.

      XI. Meditating on the sun.
      (Soorya Darshanam dhyaanam va).

      (Looking at or mentally visualising the sun, to give them power to lead a creative, useful and meaningful life).

      The bride and the bridegroom together pray:
      O God, who art the illuminator of the sun, may we, through thy grace live for a hundred years, hear for a hundred years, and speak for a hundred years. And may we never be dependent upon anybody. May we likewise live even beyond a hundred years!
      -Rig Veda, VII. 66. 16)

      XII Touching the Heart
      (Hriday sparsh)

      Touching the heart of the bride
      The Bridegroom says:
      May I have hearty co-operation from these in the performance of my duties. May thou be of one mind with me. May thou be consentient to my speech. May the Lord of creation unite thee to me!

      The Bride:
      May I have hearty co-operation from these in the performance of my duties. May thou be of one mind with me. May thou be consentient to my speech. May the Lord of creation unite thee to me!

      XII.Meditating upon the Pole Star and the Arundhati Star (Dhruva dhyaanam darshanam va)

      [Note: The Pole Star is stationary and fixed in its position, likewise the couple is expected to be steadfast and firm in fulfilling their vows and responsibilities.]

      The bride:
      ust as the star Arundhati is attached to the star Vasishtha, so may I be ever firmly attached to my husband!

      Placing his hand upon the bride’s forehead

      The bridegroom:
      As the heavens are permanently stable, as the earth is permanently stable, as these mountains are permanently stable, and as the entire universe is permanent stable, so may my wife be permanently settled in our family! -Rig Veda X.173.4

      (Addressing the bride):
      hou are the Pole star; I see in thee stability and firmness. Mayst thou ever be steadfast in thy affection for me. The great God has united thee with me. Mayst thou live with me, blessed with children, for a hundred years!

      XIII.Partaking of food (Anna praashanam)

      In the last symbolic rite the couple make offerings of food with chantings of Vedic Havan Mantras (oblations of food in the Sacred fire). Having done that, the couple feed a morsel of food to each other from the residue of the offerings. This being the symbolic expression of mutual love and affection.

      Part Three

      XIV.Benediction (Aashirvadah)

      Placing his hand upon the forehead of the bride

      The bridegroom:
      Ye men and women present here, behold this virtuous bride possessed of high attainments, and before ye disperse, give her your blessings!

      All the people present shall pronounce the following blessings upon the couple.
      1. O Lord, may this couple be prosperous!

      2. O Lord, may this couple live in perpetual happiness!

      3 O Lord, may this couple be ever infused with love for each other. May this couple be blessed with children and grand-children and live in the best of homes for the full period of their lives!

      human life in the delightful company of your happy sons and grandsons!

      Om Shantih, Shantih, Shantih.

      [Note: The Hindu wedding ceremony may vary in minor details from region to region and different priests may adopt some variations.]

      [Sacraments constitute an important part of Hindu religion. Sacraments in Hinduism are designed to build a solid foundation for righteous living. They are known as ‘Sanskaras’.Their purpose is to create and develop a religious and spiritual outlook in life.
      The Hindu religion has instituted sixteen different Sanskaras (sacraments) meant for different phases of life from conception to marriage to old age and death. The word sanskara in Sanskrit means ‘to cause indelible impressions on the mind and to develop every aspect of one’s personality.’ Therefore it is necessary to understand and appreciate their significance and to derive benefit from their performance. Of the sixteen sanskaras in Hinduism, the sacrament of marriage or Vivah Sanskara is the most important. Marriage influences the personality of man and woman as life partners, enabling them to take their rightful place in society.]

    1. One day a group of boys

      One day a group of boys
      Decided to have a race
      They chose to climb a great big tree
      And set off at a pace

      The rest of their friends gathered
      To see the boys at play
      They talked about it to themselves
      “Will they make it?” “No way!”

      They called up to the children
      “You’ll never make it up that tree”
      But the boys just kept on climbing
      And said “just watch and you will see”

      But the others, how they shouted
      And thought the boys tried to ignore
      They began to drop out one by one
      Another, another and then more

      But one boy kept on climbing
      And made it to the top of the tree
      He never lost faith but believed in himself
      And said “this won’t defeat me”

      The others were quite amazed
      At the squirrel at the top of the tree
      “How on earth did he do it?” they said
      “Well”, said one, “he’s completely deaf, you see”

      So the motto of this poem is
      You can reach the top of the tree
      Just don’t listen to what others say
      Just believe in yourself and you’ll see………

      Lessons in Life

      Lessons in Life

      'To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolls over Yearly '

      1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

      2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

      3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

      4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

      5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

      6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

      7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

      8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

      9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

      10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

      11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

      12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

      13. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

      14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

      15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

      16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.

      17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.

      18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.

      19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

      20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

      21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

      22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

      23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

      24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

      25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

      26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?'

      27. Always choose life.

      28. Forgive everyone, everything.

      29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

      30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.

      31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

      32. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

      33. Believe in miracles.

      34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

      35. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

      36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

      37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.

      38. Read the Psalms and Proverbs. They cover every human emotion.

      39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

      40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

      41. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

      42. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

      43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

      44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

      45. The best is yet to come.

      46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

      47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

      48. If you don't ask, you don't get.

      49. Yield.

      50. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

      What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

      Tom Telfer, B.A., London,Ontario, Canada

      Monday, May 26, 2008

      How leaders should manage failure?

      'A Leader Should Know How to Manage Failure' (Former President of India APJ Abdul Kalam at Wharton India Economic forum , Philadelphia, March 22, 2008)

      Question: Could you give an example, from your own experience, of how leaders should manage failure?

      Kalam: Let me tell you about my experience. In 1973 I became the project director of India's satellite launch vehicle program, commonly called the SLV-3. Our goal was to put India's 'Rohini' satellite into orbit by 1980. I was given funds and human resources -- but was told clearly that by 1980 we had to launch the satellite into space. Thousands of people worked together in scientific and technical teams towards that goal.
      By 1979 -- I think the month was August -- we thought we were ready. As the project director, I went to the control center for the launch. At four minutes before the satellite launch, the computer began to go through the checklist of items that needed to be checked. One minute later, the computer program put the launch on hold; the display showed that some control components were not in order. My experts -- I had four or five of them with me -- told me not to worry; they had done their calculations and there was enough reserve fuel. So I bypassed the computer, switched to manual mode, and launched the rocket. In the first stage, everything worked fine. In the second stage, a problem developed. Instead of the satellite going into orbit, the whole rocket system plunged into the Bay of Bengal. It was a big failure.

      That day, the chairman of the Indian Space Research Organization, Prof. Satish Dhawan, had called a press conference. The launch was at 7:00 am, and the press conference -- where journalists from around the world were present -- was at 7:45 am at ISRO's satellite launch range in Sriharikota [in Andhra Pradesh in southern India]. Prof. Dhawan, the leader of the organization, conducted the press conference himself. He took responsibility for the failure -- he said that the team had worked very hard, but that it needed more technological support. He assured the media that in another year, the team would definitely succeed. Now, I was the project director, and it was my failure, but instead, he took responsibility for the failure as chairman of the organization.
      The next year, in July 1980, we tried again to launch the satellite -- and this time we succeeded. The whole nation was jubilant. Again, there was a press conference. Prof. Dhawan called me aside and told me, 'You conduct the press conference today.'

      I learned a very important lesson that day. When failure occurred, the leader of the organization owned that failure. When success came, he gave it to his team. The best management lesson I have learned did not come to me from reading a book; it came from that experience.

      Thursday, May 22, 2008

      Make a Habit of Doing It Now (also find attachment)

      Make a Habit of Doing It Now (also find attachment)
      ------------ --------- --------- ---
      We have all procrastinated at some time in our lives. I know I have, only to have regretted it later. Procrastination leads to a negative attitude. The habit of procrastination fatigues you more than the effort it takes to do it.
      A completed task is fulfilling and energizing; an incomplete task drains energy like a leak from a tank.

      If you want to build and maintain a positive attitude, get into the habit of living in the present and doing it now.
      He slept beneath the moon
      He basked beneath the sun
      He lived a life of going to do
      and died with nothing done.
      --James Albery

      When I Become a Big Boy
      This is like the little boy who says when I become a big boy, I will do this and this and I will be happy. And when he becomes a big boy he says, when I finish college and do this and this and I will be happy. And when he finishes college he says when I get my first job and do this and this I will be happy. And when he gets his first job he says when I get married and do this and this and then I will be happy. And when he gets married he says when the kids get out of school and I do this and this I will be I happy. And when the kids
      get out of school, he says when I retire and do this and this, I will be happy. And when he retires what does he see? He sees life has just gone by in front of his eyes. * "Creed for Optimists" by Christian D. Larsen, in The Best of ... Bits Pieces, Economics Press, Fairfield, NJ, 1994, p. 3.
      Some people practice procrastination by hiding behind high sounding words, saying "I'm analyzing" and six months later they are still analyzing. What they don't realize is that they are suffering from a disease called, "Paralysis of Analysis" and they will never succeed.
      Then there is another breed of people who procrastinate by saying "I'm getting ready" and a month later they are still getting ready and six months later they are still getting ready. What they don't realize is they are suffering from a disease called "Excusitis." They keep making excuses.
      Life is not a dress rehearsal. I don't care what philosophy you believe in--we have got only one shot at this game called life. The stakes are too high. The stakes are the future generations.
      What time is it and where are we? The answer is now and we are here. Let's make the best of now and utilize the present to the fullest. The message is not that we don't need to plan for the future. The message is that we do need to plan for the future. If we utilize our present to its fullest, we are sowing the seeds for a better future automatically, aren't we?
      If you want to build a positive attitude, learn the phrase, "do it now" and stop the habit of procrastination.

      The saddest words in life are:
      ¨ "It might have been."
      ¨ "I should have."
      ¨ "I could have."
      ¨ "I wish I had."
      ¨ "If only I had given a little extra."
      Never leave till tomorrow which you can do today.

      --Benjamin Franklin

      about love

      A Nice Article about Love
      -by Swami Vivekananda

      I once had a friend who grew to be very close to me.

      Once when we were sitting at the edge of a swimming pool, she filled the palm of her hand with some water and held it before me, and said this: "You see this water carefully contained on my hand? It symbolizes Love."

      This was how I saw it: As long as you keep your hand caringly open and allow it to remain there, it will always be there. However, if you attempt to close your fingers round it and try to posses it, it will spill through the first cracks it finds.

      This is the greatest mistake that people do when they meet love...they try to posses it, they demand, they expect... and just like the water spilling out of your hand, love will retrieve from you .

      For love is meant to be free, you cannot change its nature. If there are people you love, allow them to be free beings.

      Give and don't expect.
      Advise, but don't order.
      Ask, but never demand.

      It might sound simple, but it is a lesson that may take a lifetime to truly practice. It is the secret to true love. To truly practice it, you must sincerely feel no expectations from those who you love, and yet an unconditional caring."

      Passing thought... Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take; but by the moments that take our breath away.....



      There was a man who worked for the railroad. One day as he went into the freezer compartment to do his routine work, the door accidentally closed and he found himself trapped in the compartment.

      He shouted for help but no one heard him since it was past midnight. He tried to break down the door but he could not. As he lay in the freezer compartment, he began to feel colder, and colder. Then he began to feel weaker, and weaker, and he wrote on the wall of the compartment, “I am feeling colder, and colder; and I am getting weaker, and weaker. I am dying, and this may be my last words”.

      In the morning when the other workers opened up the compartment they found him dead. The sad twist to the above story is that the freezing apparatus in the compartment had broke down a few days earlier.

      The poor worker did not know about the damaged freezing apparatus and in his mind the freezing apparatus was working perfectly. He felt cold, got weaker and literally willed himself to die.


      Our sub-conscious mind can be cheated. The sub-conscious mind can only accept and act on information passed to it by the conscious mind. It has no capacity to reject or decline any instructions or
      information passed to it by the conscious mind. In the case of the poor worker, he consciously thought that he was getting colder, weaker and dying and the sub-conscious mind accepted the above instructions and affected his physical body. That was how he willed
      himself to die.


      "Every now and then go away, have a little relaxation, for when you come back to your work your judgment will be surer. Go some distance away because then the work appears smaller and more of it can be taken in at a glance and a lack of harmony and proportion is more readily seen."


      Story told by a man which is most frightening yet thought-provoking experiences of his life. He had been on a long flight. The first warning of the approaching problems came when the sign on the airplane flashed on: "Fasten your seat belts."Then, after a while, a calm voice said, "We shall not be serving the beverages at this time as we are expecting a little turbulence. Please be sure your seat belt is fastened."

      As he looked around the aircraft, it became obvious that many of the passengers were becoming apprehensive. Later, the voice of the announcer said, "We are so sorry that we are unable to serve the meal at this time. The turbulence is still ahead of us."

      And then the storm broke. The ominous cracks of thunder could be heard even above the roar of the engines. Lightening lit up the darkening skies, and within moments that great plane was like a cork tossed around on a celestial ocean. One moment the airplane was lifted on terrific currents of air; the next, it dropped as if it were about to crash.

      The man confessed that he shared the discomfort and fear of those around him. He said, "As I looked around the plane, I could see that nearly all the passengers were upset and alarmed. Some were praying.

      The future seemed ominous and many were wondering if they would make it through the storm. And then, I suddenly saw a girl to whom the storm meant nothing. She had tucked her feet beneath her as she sat on her seat and was reading a book.

      Everything within her small world was calm and orderly. Sometimes she closed her eyes, then she would read again; then she would straighten her legs, but worry and fear were not in her world. When the plane was being buffeted by the terrible storm, when it lurched this way and that, as it rose and fell with frightening severity, when all the adults were scared half to death, that marvelous child was completely composed and unafraid."

      The man could hardly believe his eyes. It was not surprising therefore, that when the plane finally reached its destination and all the passengers were hurrying to disembark, he lingered to speak to the girl whom he had watched for such a long time.

      Having commented about the storm and behavior of the plane, he asked why she had not been afraid.

      The sweet child replied, "Sir, my Dad is the pilot, and he is taking me home."

      Success To A Happy Married Life..

      A man and a woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

      For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife ' s bedside.

      She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box. When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He asked her about the contents.

      "When we were to be married," she said, "my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll."

      The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness.

      "Honey," he said "that explains the doll, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?"

      "Oh, that?" she said. "That is the money I made from selling the dolls." : )

      The Fish and the Turtle

      Once upon a time there was a fish. And just because it was a fish, it had lived all its life in the water and knew nothing whatever about anything else but water. And one day as it swam about in the lake where all its days had been spent, it happened to meet a turtle of its acquaintance who had just come back from a little excursion on the land.

      "Good day, Mr. Turtle!" said the fish. "I have not seen you for a long time. Where have you been?"
      "Oh", said the turtle, "I have just been for a trip on dry land."

      "On dry land!" exclaimed the fish.
      "What do you mean by on dry land? There is no dry land. I had never seen such a thing. Dry land is nothing."
      "Well," said the turtle good-naturedly. "If you want to think so, of course you may; there is no one who can hinder you. But that's where I've been, all the same."

      "Oh, come," said the fish. "Try to talk sense. Just tell me now what is this land of yours like? Is it all wet?"
      "No, it is not wet," said the turtle. "Is it nice and fresh and cool?" asked the fish.
      "No, it is not nice and fresh and cool," the trutle replied.
      "Is it clear so that light can come through it?"
      "No, it is not clear. Light cannot come through it."
      "Is it soft and yielding, so that I can move my fins about in it and push my nose through it?"
      "No, it is not soft and yielding. You could not swim in it."
      "Does it move or flow in streams?"
      "No, it neither moves nor flows in streams."
      "Does it ever rise up into waves then, with white foams in them?" asked the fish, impatient at this string of Noes.
      "No!" replied the turtle, truthfully. "It never rises up into waves that I have seen."

      "There now," exclaimed the fish triumphantly. "Didn't I tell you that this land of yours was just nothing? I have just asked, and you have answered me that it is neither wet nor cool, not clear nor soft and that it does not flow in streams nor rise up into waves. And if it isn't a single one of these things what else is it but nothing? Don't tell me."

      "Well, well", said the turtle, "If you are determined to think that dry land is nothing, I suppose you must just go on thinking so. But any one who knows what is water and what is land would say you were just a silly fish, for you think that anything you have never known is nothing just because you have never known it."

      And with that the turtle turned away and, leaving the fish behind in its little pond of water, set out on another excursion over the dry land that was nothing.

      Wednesday, May 21, 2008

      Cow is the back-bone of Indian economy

      Cow is the back-bone of Indian economy. India was golden bird until cow was base of agriculture. Farmers had investment free farming. Now diesel, fertilizer, harvester combines, need capital investments. Therefore, farmers are suiciding due to debt and loss in production. Respect cow else get eradicated.


      AtharvVeda III.30.1 You should impart love to each other as the(non-killable) cow does for its calf.
      AtharvVeda IV.21.7 You strengthen the weak by your Nectar-like milk and your glory is sung in great
      AtharvVeda XI.1.34 states "dhenuh sadanam rayeenam" i.e. 'cow is the fountainhead of all the bounties'.
      RgVeda VI.28.1 states 'Let there be cows in our homes and they will impart milk and ghee to be utilized for yajna'
      RgVeda VI.28.2 states 'Indra bestows strength and showers its bounties on the performer of yajna'
      RgVeda VI.28.5 states 'cow's milk is used in the first offering (ahuti) to Soma'
      RgVeda VI.28.6 states 'Oh sweet mooing cows! Glorify our abode and your products may benefit all of us'
      RgVeda VI.28.7 states 'Cows may multiply and be fed appropriately and no one should torture them'
      YajurVeda XXIII.48 states "Gostu matra n vidyate" i.e. Cow cannot be compared with anything.

      The above quotes from Vedas represent abundant Self evidence to substantiate our stand that Vedas have been misinterpreted and Cow's killers deserve punishment and a BAN ON COW SLAUGHTER
      is a must for this sacred land.

      Tuesday, May 20, 2008

      Celebration means......

      Celebration means......
      Four friends.
      Bahar barsaat.
      Four glasses of beer.

      Celebration means......
      Hundred bucks of petrol.
      A rusty old bike.
      And an open road.

      Celebration means......
      Maggi noodles.
      A hostel room.
      4.25 a.m.

      Celebration means......
      3 old friends.
      3 separate cities.
      3 coffee mugs.
      1 internet messenger.

      Celebration means......
      Rain on a hot tin roof.
      Pakoras deep-frying.
      Neighbours dropping in.
      A party.

      Celebration means......
      You and mom.
      A summer night.
      A bottle of coconut oil.
      A head massage.

      You can spend
      Hundreds on birthdays,
      Thousands on festivals,
      Lakhs on weddings,
      but to celebrate
      all you have to do is
      spend your time with your dear ones

      So.. keep in touch with people close to your heart .....

      This was so nice ... so I thought I would share it with you !!


      Lesson 1:

      A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings.
      The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.
      Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 to drop that towel, "
      After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.
      The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.
      When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, "Who was that?"
      "It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.
      "Great," the husband says, "did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?"

      Moral of the story
      If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with your shareholders in time,you may be in a position to prevent avoidable exposure.


      Lesson 2:

      A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.
      The nun said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
      The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again.
      The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?"
      The priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak."
      Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.
      On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129 It said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory."

      Moral of the story
      If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.


      Lesson 3:

      A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out.
      The Genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish."
      "Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world."
      Puff! She's gone.
      "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life."
      Puff! He's gone.
      "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager.
      The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

      Moral of the story
      Always let your boss have the first say.


      Lesson 4:

      An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"
      The eagle answered: "Sure , why not."
      So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

      Moral of the story
      To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.


      Lesson 5:

      A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey,"but I haven't got the energy."
      "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull.
      They're packed with nutrients."
      The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.
      The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
      Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

      Moral of the story
      BullShit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.


      Lesson 6:

      A little bird was flying south for the Winter.It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was.
      The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
      A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
      Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

      Morals of this story

      (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.

      (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.

      (3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth



      Name of Paper: Times of India (MUMBAI MIRROR)

      5th May 08 (Page 22)


      - Radhakrishnan 'Chanakya' Pillai

      (This weekly column will bring out the relevance of Kautilya's Arthashastra in today's corporate world)

      Take any organisation and you are bound to find a boss who is frustrated with his subordinates. While a junior worker can be blamed for non-productivity to some extent, most of the problem is caused due to a lack of proper planning before delegating the work itself.

      In Arthashastra, Chanakya had included a chapter on 'Training of elephants'. He said: "In conformity with the appearance, he should give exercise to the gentle and the dull (elephant), and to the animal with mixed characteristics, in various types of work, or in accordance with the season." (2.31.18)

      So Chanakya calls for identifying a potential candidate as per its (an elephant in this case) nature and even according to the different seasons as it may affect the work which has to be given.

      In human terms, we can understand how much thought has to be given to choose the 'right person for the right job'.

      After all, a mistake at this stage can create real frustration in the long run.

      But how does one do that?


      This is the first step for effectively carrying out what is called man-management. Many bosses fail to do this. When an interview is conducted, an shrewdly written CV or resume can impress all. Even the answers and discussions in the interview itself may portray the candidate as promising one.

      But there is a big difference between promises and actual delivery of work. Give yourself time before passing judgement on any person. Always observe and study a person for a minimum of three months (that's what training periods are for).

      Watch them closely and observe their strengths and weaknesses. You will get a better grasp of his nature, behaviour and potential output.


      A person who is very successful in one venture may not be successful if given another one in a different situation. Even the most successful salesman may fail when it comes to selling a different product or in a different region.

      So understand that each person's output is not guaranteed forever. Different situations and circumstances can change a person's productivity and even performance. And you have to identify them.


      Next, you really need to understand how a person's output changes in different timings. For example, students generally learn much better if they study during early mornings.

      That's because the mind tends to become lazy later on in the day and, hence, memorising topics takes more effort on the student's part.

      Chanakya referred to this as "seasons". So find out what are the best productive times for your subordinates and allocate work "...in accordance with the season!"

      All successful businessmen and leaders know the art of delegating work. If you want to be a successfully man-manager too, then thinking, planning, studying and experimenting with human psychology will become essential.

      Monday, May 12, 2008

      Chat with God

      please go thorugh this link

      to have Char with God

      India Is Great

      Please find here glorious past present and future of India.

      How to catch Lion

      Newton 's Method:

      Let, the lion catch you.

      For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.

      Implies you caught lion.

      ************ ********

      Einstein Method:

      Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion.

      Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will also run faster and will get tired soon.

      Now you can trap it easily.

      ************ ********

      Software Engineer Method:

      Catch a cat and claim that your testing has proven that its a Lion.

      If anyone comes back with issues tell that you will upgrade it to Lion.

      ************ ********

      Indian Police Method:

      Catch any animal and interrogate it & torture it to accept that its a lion .

      ************ ********

      Rajnikanth Method :

      Keep warning the lion that u may come and attack anytime.

      The lion will live in fear and die soon in fear itself.

      ************ ********

      Jayalalitha Method:

      Send Police commissioner Muthukaruppan around 2AM and kill it, while it's sleeping !

      ************ ********

      Manirathnam Method (director):

      Make sure the lion does not get sun light and put the lion in a dark room with a single candle lighted.

      Keep murmuring something in its ears.

      The lion will be highly irritated and commit suicide.

      ************ ********

      Karan Johar Method (director):

      Send a lioness into the forest.

      Our lion and lioness fall in love with each other.

      Send another lioness in to the forest, followed by another lion.

      First lion loves the first lioness and the second lion loves the 2nd lioness.

      But 2nd lioness loves both lions.

      Now send another lioness (third) into the forest.

      You don't understand right... ok....read it after 15 yrs, then also u wont!

      ************ ********

      Yash Chopra method (director):

      Take the lion to Australia or US.. and kill it in a good scenic location.

      ************ ********

      Govinda method:

      Continuously dance before the lion for 5 or 6 days. The Lion will drop dead just watching!

      ************ ********

      Menaka Gandhi method:

      Save the lion from a danger and feed him with some vegetables continuously.

      ************ ********

      George bush method:

      Link the lion with Osama bin laden and shoot him!!!

      ************ ********

      Ravi Shastri method:

      Ask the lion to bowl at u.

      U bat for 200 balls and score 1 run

      Lion tired and

      Sunday, May 11, 2008

      I asked God to take away my habit.

      I asked God to take away my habit.

      God said, no.

      It is not for me to take away, but for you to give it up.

      I asked God to make my handicapped child whole.

      God said, no.

      His spirit is whole, his body is only temporary

      I asked God to grant me patience.

      God said, no.

      Patience is a byproduct of tribulations; it isn't granted, it is learned.

      I asked God to give me happiness.

      God said, no.

      I give you blessings; Happiness is up to you.

      I asked God to spare me pain.

      God said, no.

      Suffering draws you apart from worldly cares and brings you closer to me.

      I asked God to make my spirit grow.

      God said, no.

      You must grow on your own! , but I will prune you to make you fruitful.

      I asked God for all things that I might enjoy life.

      God said, no.

      I will give you life, so that you may enjoy all things.

      I asked God to help me LOVE others, as much as He loves me.

      God said...Hahn, finally you have the idea.

      Friday, May 9, 2008

      A Glass of Milk

      A Glass of Milk help can make miracles in life. It is told one shouild give up for others needy and poor one. It is called in Sanskrit"Tyen taktyen Bhunjita"( Enjoy by giving p yours things to others

      Thursday, May 8, 2008

      Never be weak

      16. Stamping down the weakness of mind and heart,stand up, saying, "I am possessed of heroism, I am
      possessed of a steady intellect..." Never allow weakness to overtake your mind.
      17. strength is the medecine for the world's disease.Strength is the medecine which poor must have when
      tyrannised over by the rich. strength is the medecine that the ignorant must have when oppressed by learned.
      18. This is very true, this is a thing which should not be forgotten. heroes alone enjoy the world. Show
      your heroism...otherwise , you live a disgraceful life if you pocket your insults when u are kickedand
      trodden down by anyone who takes it into his head to do so; your life is a veritable hell here, so is the
      life hereafter. this is my advice to you.. ofcourse you donot do any wrong, do not injure or tyrannise
      over anyone, but try to do good to others as much as you can. but passively submit to wrong done by others
      is a sin.. try to pay them back in their own coin then and there.
      19. First you have to build the body by good nutritious food - then only will the mind be strong. the mind if but the subtle part of body.
      20. The only test of good things is that they make us strong.
      21. As soon as your say, "I am little mortal being" you are saying something which is not true, you are
      giving the lie to yourself, you are hypnotising yourself into something vile and weak.
      22. The infinite strength of the world is yours. drive out the superstition that has covered your minds. let us be brave.
      23. By degrees the heart has to be strengthened. if one man is made, it equals result of a thousand lectures.
      24. whatever you think, that you will be. If you think yourselves to be weak, weak you will be; if you think
      yourselves strong, strong you willbe; if you think yourselves impure, impure you will be; if you think
      yourself pure, pure you will be. This teaches us not to think oursleves as weak, but as strong, omnipotent,
      25. Know that every thought and word that weakens you in the world is the only evil that exists. whatever
      makes man weak and fear is the only evil that should be shunned.
      26. The greatest sin is to think yourself weak.
      27. I beg you to understand that one fact - no good comes out of the man who day and night thinks he is
      nobody. If a man day and night thinks he is miserable low and nothing, nothing he becomes.. That is the
      great fact which you ought to remember.
      28. Being reminded of weakness does not help much; give strength, and strength doesnt come by thinking of
      weakness all the time. the remedy for weakness is not brooding over weakness, but thinking of strength.
      29. To call another a sinner is the worst thing you can do.

      Some facts

      The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.

      Our eyes remain the same size from birth onward, but our noses and ears never stop growing.

      You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching TV.

      A person will die from total lack of sleep sooner than from starvation. Death will occur about 10 days without sleep, while starvation takes a few weeks.

      Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.

      The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows.

      Alexander Graham Bell, the inventor of the telephone, never telephoned his wife or mother because they were both deaf.

      Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.

      'I am.' is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.

      Colgate faced a big obstacle marketing toothpaste in Spanish speaking countries because Colgate translates into the command 'go hang yourself.'

      Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different.

      'Bookkeeper' is the only word in English language with three consecutive double letters.

      The sentence 'the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog' uses every letter in the English language.

      If the population of China walked past you in single line, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

      China has more English speakers than the United States.

      Every human spent about half an hour as a single cell.

      Each square inch of human skin consists of twenty feet of blood vessels.

      An average person uses the bathroom 6 times per day.

      Babies are born with 300 bones, but by adulthood we have only 206 in our bodies.

      Beards are the fastest growing hairs on the human body. If the average man never trimmed his beard, it would grow to nearly 30 feet long in his lifetime.

      According to Genesis 1:20-22, the chicken came before the egg.

      If you leave Tokyo by plane at 7:00am, you will arrive in Honolulu at approximately 4:30pm the previous day.

      Strange-but-true The average four year-old child asks over four hundred questions a day.

      The three wealthiest families in the world have more assets than the combined wealth of the forty-eight poorest nations.

      The first owner of the Marlboro cigarette Company died of lung Cancer.