Dear Digvijay Singhji,
I have been studying your public persona for the last decade, particularly since the UPA regime came to power, where your genius had maximum opportunity to flower and realise itself. I always awaited your periodic public utterances with much anticipation, to take a peek at your resilient and innovative mind, and the contribution it makes to the present governance model of chaos. Yours has been a particularly hard life for the last decade after you lost power as Chief Minister. I can see your anguish and trauma in having to countenance, year after year, the BJP ruling over what was once your great empire. This must have taken an awful psychological toll over you, and your behaviour suggests that you have still not come to terms with this reality. As a matter of fact, I am getting a little concerned about you of late, as your condition appears to be getting somewhat pathological and extreme, so much so, that often your speech and behaviour make no sense to anyone. It's almost as if the vision of the BJP occupying your former chair is so deeply imprinted in your brain that it never leaves your consciousness, and all your utterances get coloured by it. It is reported that you tried to seek solace through a vow that you will remain out of active politics for 10 years. Commendable, at a time when Liquor gate was chasing you, the Lokayukta was registering FIRs against you in urban land ceiling and land scam cases, and the Madhya Pradesh Bureau of Investigation for Economic Offences was investigating your Treasure Island Mall scam, for which I believe an FIR has recently been filed. Yes, it's a hard life indeed, having to take painful decisions of self-abnegation in the prime of your life, much like your leader. But I'm sure you are aware that both nature and human personality abhor a vacuum and find other ways to fill it.
I believe you are a fascinating subject for an in-depth psychological study. What extra-ordinary methods you have devised to fight your deprivation, frustration and FIRs. I wish I knew more about your childhood. I know you come from a princely Rajput family where you would have lacked nothing, but I often wonder whether you were prone to tantrums or indulged in other attention-seeking behaviour as a child, or sucked your thumb beyond the acceptable age for gaining comfort or a sense of security (a common interpretation by psychologists). Perhaps these have all evolved into the traits you display today for getting comfort and security. Your desire to seek attention, either from the general public or the special targeted few, seems to be accelerating at such a rapid pace that I am a little worried about your state of mind. It is getting just a little too repetitive, and predictable. In psychology, repetitive speech disorder is considered a serious form of thought disorder, which ranges from delusion, obsessive-compulsive disorder syndrome to something called schizophasia and another thing called palilalia, where I believe some chromosome or other is involved. I have noticed that your thought disorder, repetitive speech disorder and obsessive-compulsive disorder syndromes seem stuck on just three subjects: making Rahul Gandhi Prime Minister, allying with jihadi terrorist groups (remember your Freudian slip "Osamaji"?) and using every opportunity to accuse the RSS whenever an unfortunate act of terrorism happens in India. Obviously, your thought disorder syndrome is so acute, that even our policemen killed in terrorist attacks do not shake it – you call the Batla House shootout a fake encounter, where two of our policemen died. You don't even spare the martyrs: Hemant Karkare's tragic death in the 26/11 blasts sets you off on a delusionary mode where you imagine a telephone call from him fearing an attack upon himself from Hindu organisations. The Maharashtra government put the record straight and said that no such thing had happened. This disorder is clinically termed as the full blown phase of delusion. Your condition seems to have palpably worsened since then, as you made another extremely disturbing delusionary statement just after the recent Mumbai blasts that resulted in the loss of more than 200 lives. Even while the investigation was going on and the country was trying to speak in one voice, you predictably stated that you did not rule out the involvement of the Sangh in the bombings. In fact, I have a personal grievance against you on this count: I lost a bet with a friend who predicted your statement just a few hours before you made it. I don't know whether foreign powers are aware of your various thought and speech disorders, but it would be in your interest to tell them frankly. Otherwise, you and your party are getting to be seen in very poor light. Indeed, the WikiLeaks, in ignorance, I'm sure, of your various disorders, calls your behaviour "crass political opportunism". And also please recall the snub you got from Israel when during some particularly bad delusionary spell you tried to compare the RSS with the Nazis. My sincere advice to you, as an elder, is to diversify your intelligence and vast experience to reflect upon critical issues of contemporary India, for example, how to remove poverty, how to provide safe drinking water and sanitation to every village in India, how to improve the health status and infant mortality situation in the country, how to increase female literacy, areas in which the state that you led for 10 years is among the worst in India. But, perhaps, I have got it all wrong. Perhaps you only pretend to have all these disorders, so that you gain sole monopoly of being the Gandhi family mouthpiece, at the cost of your mental credibility, particularly for making Rahul Gandhi the next Prime Minister. Perhaps you do this so that you can play vote-bank politics of the worst kind, even at the cost of national unity by creating fissures where none exists, and can claim to be the main architect for making Rahul Gandhi the hero of the next UP elections. Perhaps, I have got even that wrong.
You must know, I'm sure, that there is some speculation in the media that you are doing all of this for Rahul Gandhi in name only, and since you know he is so below par that he will never make it, you are actually working towards your own future as Prime Minister. Your ten-year vow will also be ending shortly. To use your own words, I suppose this possibility cannot be ruled out.
Sincerely Ram Jethmalani